Ghalib vs Bedi

Two shers each reflect similar thoughts about the effect that half opened eyes of the beloved brings upon the lover. There is a subtle difference though that needs to be understood.

1. Ghalib says:

کوئ میرے دل سے پوچھے تیرے تیر نیم کش کو

یہ خلش کہاں سے ہوتی جو جگر کے پار ہوتا

Koi mere dil se puchhe tere teer e meem kash ko

Ye khalish kahaan se hoti jo jigar ke paar hota.

Teer e Neem kash : an arrow shot with the bow only half stretched. ( i.e. eyes half closed looking at the lover)

Khalish: pain

Who will know the anguish my soul feels after receiving your half powered arrow that has remained stuck in my being. Would I be experiencing this pain had it gone right through my heart?.

Mahinder Singh Bedi said:

ہوا جو تیر _نظر نیم کش تو کیا حاصل

مزہ تو جب ہے کہ سینے کے آر پار چلے

Hua jo teer-e-nazar neem-kash to kya hasil
Maza to jab hai ki seene ke aar-paar chale.

Teer e nazar : arrow of glance

Neem kash: half stretched.

What can be achieved with a glance with eyes half closed like a half stretched arrow.

It would be great if it were to go right through the heart.

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One (Ghalib) feels great pain ( read pleasure) when the arrow is stuck in the heart and the other (Bedi) wishes it to pierce the heart through and then he would feel joy.